A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin. -H.L. Mencken
I have a heart of a child. I keep it in a jar on my shelf. -Robert Bloch
It's the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter. -Marlene Dietrich
Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig and then suddenly he turns on you with a miniature machine gun. -Matt Groening
Sex is a momentary itch; love never lets you go. - Kingsley Amis
To fall in love is to create a religion that has a fallible god. -Jorge Luis Borges
I wasted time, and now doth time waste me. -William Shakespeare
The place where optimism most flourishes is the lunatic asylum. -Havelock Ellis
What worries you masters you. - Haddon W. Robinson
Most people would rather be certain they're miserable than risk being happy. -Robert Anthony
From the Reader's Digest Treasury of Wit & Wisdom; 4000 if funniest, cleverest, most insightful things ever said
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